The Eternal One-Liners/Punches/Gags from Bollywood

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Recent years in Bollywood have established female actors with Power-Packed roles in the industry. Kangana Ranaut commanded the Box-office in 2014-2015 & her few dialogues have become like those remarkable oneliners we have been reciting since aeons. “Adrak ho gaya hai yeh aadmi, kahin se bhi badhh raha hai..” [TWM 2] sounds befitting for a woman disgusted with her partner. She hopelessly declared her own plight in “Queen”- “Mera haal na Gupta uncle jaissa ho gaya hai. Gupta uncle ko na Cancer ho gaya hai. Unhonne kabhi sharaab nahi pee, cigarette nahin pee, phir bhi ho gaya. Is-sse achha toh pee hi lette..” . Previously we had [The “Cult” one-liner statement of Today] Sonakshi Sinha announcing “ Thhapadd se darr nahi laggta sahib, pyaar se laggta hai..” [DABANGG] after the Raunchy statement from Vidya Balan “ Filmein sirff 3 cheezon ki wajah se chalti hain, Entertainment, Entertainment, aur Entertainment..” [THE DIRTY PICTURE]. Priyanka Chopra delivered one as well; “Ittna bhi matt darao ki darr hi khatamm ho jae..”  [MARY KOM] while Amrita Singh taunted Arjun Kapoor with “Makhhan khaane ki cheez hai laggane ki nahi..” [2 STATES].

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Hindi Film Heroines have delivered some memorable Dialogues along with equally catchy statements which have been appropriately/in-appropriately used by many. Bollywood fans have a variety of cheesy gags in their kitty. From Hema Malini’s “Chall Dhanno aaj teri basanti ki izzat ka sawal hai…”[SHOLAY] & “Bhaagne ka naam jawaani aur thhamm gayi toh thhehra paani…” [DHARMATAMA] to Rakhi’s “Mere Karan Arjun aaenge…” [KARAN-ARJUN]; Sridevi’s “Mein madira nahin peeti g..” [CHAALBAAZ] to Madhuri Dixit’s “Kyon .. Hum aapke hain kaun” [HAHK]; Tabu’s “100 kutte bhi mill karr sher ka shikaar nahin karr sakkte…” [JEET]; Aishwarya Rai’s “Sameer… hawaa ka jhaunkka” [HDDCS] & Kajol’s “Ek daa wadda dil te dooje de wadde wadde bill…” [K3G]: these quotes have floated universally. Kajol’s “Kuchch Kuchch hota hai Rahul.. tum nahin samjhoge…” [KKHH] is an evergreen Quote. Deepika Padukone’s “Ek chuttki sindoor ki keemat tum kya jaano Ramesh baabu…” [OSO] & “Kahan se khareedi ittni Bokwaas dictionary….” [CHENNAI EXPRESS] are an integral part of Mimicry by children today. And once Kareena Kapoor said Mein apni khud ki favourite hoon…” [JAB WE MET].
image   Salman-Khan-best-dialogues-in-Wanted srk-ddlj

Our very own “Dabangg” Singhams [Heroes] have had their own share in launching “Bhaari-Bharkam” Fauladi punches on cinema-screens. Salman Khan threatened “Chhedi laal” with “Hum tum mein ittne chhed karenge ki confuse ho jaoge; ke saans kahan se lein aur $@@$ein kahan se..” ; claimed with Elan “Ek baar jo meinne commitment karr di, usske baad toh mein khud ki bhi nahi sunnta…” [WANTED] ; “kicked” his fans with “Mein dil mein aata hoon, samajh mein nahin” [KICK]. His maiden punch-line was “Dosti ka ek usool hai madam, no sorry no thank you..” [MAINE PYAR KIYA]. ShahRukh Khan is credited with giving the “mantra” to desperate lovers in “I Love you KKKkiran…”; “Palatt..”; “Rahul..naam toh sunna hoga…”; “Marr gaya Rahul…” ; “Aur pass…Aur pass..” ; “Badde Badde shehron mein aissi Chhoti Chhoti baatein hotti rehti hain, senorita…” and his “ 70 minute hain tumhare pass…” speech is a landmark in motivational “Dramatization”. “Don ko pakkadna mushkil hi nahi naamumkin hai…” [DON] was perfectly revised by him. Aamir Khan has a few unconventional lines credited to him ; “Aal izz well Aal izz well..” [3 IDIOTS]; “Bhabhi hogi teri, shaadi hogi meri..” [ANDAAZ APNA APNA]; “Aailla…”. He tried his hands at poetry for a change [Fanaa]; “Kehte hain pyaar mein neend udd jaati hai, koi humse bhi mohabbat karre.. kambakhhtt  neend bahut aati hai ..” became an all-time favourite of “Dil-phenkoos”in India. Sunny Deol has a long list attached with his name when it comes to the Most “Thunderous” of them all; “Ye Dhaaii killo ka haath jab paddta hai na, toh aadmi uthhta nahi…uthh jaata hai” , “Tareekh pe Tareekh, Tareekh pe Tareekh millti rahi judge sahib parr insaaf nahi milla…” [DAMINI] ; “Hindustan zindabaad thha, zindabaad hai aur zindabaad rahega..” [GADAR] ; “No iff, No butt, sirff Jutt…” [JO BOLE SO NIHAAL] ; “Uttar do yeh vardi aur pehen lo Balwant rai ka patta…” [GHAYAL]. Ajay Devgan came up with the silliest of the stock recently in [Bol Bachchan] ; “When elder get cosy, don’t put nosy..” ; “My chest has become blouse…” & “Jo sheeshe ke ghar mein rehte hain, woh basement mein kapdde badalte hain..” but he had already established “Aata Maazi sattakalli….” [SINGHAM] as the outcry of a man touched at wrong ends. Akshay Kumar has had a share of equally bizarre ones: “Bachhe ki jaan lega kya…” ; “Don’t Angry me..”.

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The most original punch came in [RANJHANNA] where Zeeshan Ayub said “Mohalle ke laundon ka pyaar aksar Doctor ya Engineer uthha ke le jaate hain…”. Bollywood’s cutest star Shahid Kapoor impressed us with his “Silent ho jaa warna main violent ho jaunga…” in RRajkumar.

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Apart from these, there are numerous dialogues which are embedded in our minds which don’t necessarily need a revision. They are like those nursery rhymes we recited in school; for-ever implanted in our memory. The Bollywood “Stalwarts” have various punch-lines associated with their phenomenal Personalities. AMITABH BACHCHAN is an Idol when it comes to dialogue delivery; be it comic, tragic or dramatic. Besides “Moochein hon toh naththulaal jaissi…”, “Mere pass Maa hai…”, “Aaj shaam maut ke saath apunn ka apinnment hai,apinnment…”, “Khush toh bahut hogge tum..” , “Tum hotti toh aissa hota, tum hotti toh waissa hotta..” my personal favourites are “Jabb takk baithhne ko naa kaha jae sharafat se khadde raho, yeh police station hai tumhare baap ka ghar nahi..” [ZANJEER]; “Rishtey mein toh hum tumhaare baap laggte hain, naam hai Shehenshah…”; “Mein aaj bhi phenkke hue paisse nahin uthhata davar seth…” [DEEWAR] ; “Hum jahan khade ho jaaen line wahin se shuru hotti hai..” [KAALIA& “Mard ko dard nahin hotta..”.

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Amjad Khan is next in line with his immortal “Gabbar Singh” caboodle. “Kittne aadmi thhe..” ; “Arre o sambha…” ; “tera kya hoga re kaalia..”; “ Bahut yaarana laggta hai…” ; “Soowar ke bachho…” ; “Ye haath mujhe dedde Thaakur…”; “Jabb takk tere paer challenge isski saans chalegi…”; “Abb goli khaa…” ; “Yeh raamgarh waale apni betiyon ko kaunsi chakki ka aata khilaate hain re…” : the list is endless from Sholay. Till date these are used as common slangs by all struck with Bollywood Masala Fever. We have the irreplaceable “Ajit” Dictionary handy, passed on from generations to its next. “Mona darling…” ; “Saara shehar mujhe loin ke naam se jaanta hai…” ; “Lilly don’t be silly…” & “Raabertt…”  have been translated into numerous jokes. Villains arrived with a variety of sense & non-sense in the middle of the story. Pran subtely narrated his plight in Upkar with “Ration parr bhashann bahut hai parr bhashann pe ration nahin..” . And who can forget “Prem naam hai mera…Prem Chopra” [BOBBY] & “Main woh balla hoon jo sheeshe se pathhar ko todtta hoon…” [SOUTEN] by the meanest of all Prem Chopra.

The most hilarious ones came from Kader Khan. “Makkari ki mitti se janam lenne waale gaddari ke paudhhe…” & “Hosh mein aa zaalim gareeb jaagne waala hai, taiyyar raho bhaiya abb yeh khujjane waala hai..” [HUM] ; “Tumhaari yeh baat sunnke dil Hyderabad ki tarah aabad ho gaya..” [HIMMATWAALA] ; “Yam hain hum, Hum hain Yam..” [TAQDEEWAALA]; his dialogues flowed with the perfect comic timing he possessed on camera. Shakti Kapoor was the notorious of them all with his “Aauu Lollitta..” sounding as the perfect tone causing repulsion. He came with good ones later; “Main hoon nandu sabbka bandhu..” ; “Main ikk nanha sa, pyaara sa, chhota sa bachcha hoon…” & “Crime master GoGo…Mogambo ka bhatija”. Gulshan Grover was re-named the “Bad Man..”  after RamLakhan. He was loathsome with lines like “Ganna choos ke..” & “By God, dil garden garden ho gaya..”.

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Amrish Puri was versatile as the country’s most dreaded Villain as well as the finest supporting actor.“Mogambo khush hua…”; “Aissi maut maroonga ki bhagwaan yeh punnar-jannam waala system hi khattam karr dega…”[KARAN ARJUN] were followed by “Jaa Simran Jaa…. Jee le apni zindagi”.[DDLJ]

shatrughan-sinha-khamosh

Some unforgettable ones are by Asrani [ “Hamari jail mein surangg…haha”; “Hum angrezon ke zamane ke jailor hain…” ; “Aadhe idhar jao, aadhe udhar jao.. baaki hamare saath aao”:] all from Sholay. Paresh Rawals “Ye baburao ka ishtyle hai..”  is another memorable slang and not to forget the legendary Utpall Datt who innocently roared “Tum uss laddke se shaadi nahin karogi jiss se tum pyar karrti ho, tum uss ladke se shaadi karogi jiss se Main pyar karrta hoon…” [GOLMAAL]. And last but not in the least “Ek machhar saala aadmi ko @$&@@ banna detta hai” by Nana Patekar [YESHWANT].  Did i forget to mention the only phrase that defines MR. SHATRUGHAN SINHA? “KHAAAMOSHH!!!”

Now to present the list of “GHISSE PITTE” immortal one liners which were Dramatically highlighted in movies one after the other.

  1. Main tumhaare bachche ki ma bann ne waali hoon.
  2. Rukk jao, yeh shaadi nahin ho sakkti.
  3. Aaj shukrwaar hai aur court do dinon ke liye bandd hai.
  4. Kutte Kamine mein tera khoon pee jaunga [DHARMENDRA’S SIGNATURE WORDS].
  5. Bhagwaan ke liye mujhe chhod do.
  6. Boss maal pakkda gaya.
  7. Police ne tumhein chaaron taraf se gher liya hai. Apne aap ko police ke hawaale karr do.
  8. Log kya kahenge Beta.
  9. Ehsaan faramosh!
  10. Mein kahan hoon?
  11. Mujhe kuchh dikhayi nahin deta doctor!
  12. Door ho ja meri nazron se.
  13. Mein aapka ehsaan kabhi nahin bhoolongi.
  14. Pati parmeshwar hotta hai.
  15. Aaj karwa chauth hai.
  16. Bhabhi tumhare haath ka khaana….
  17. Mein kissi ko munh dikhaane layak nahin rahi.
  18. Ghar mein vidhwa maa kunwaari behnein.
  19. Kanoon ke haath bahut lambe hotte hain.
  20. Kya issi din ke liye paal poss ke badda kiya thha?
  21. Mein tumhare binna jee nahin sakkti.
  22. Gandi naali ke keede!
  23. Tum mere liye marr chukke ho.
  24. Khabardaar mujhe haath lagaya toh.
  25. Tumhari maa hamare kabze mein hai.
  26. Beti paraya dhann hotti hai.
  27. Maaaa mein pass ho gaya.
  28. Kaan kholkar sunn lo.
  29. Aardder Aaarder!
  30. Judge saaheb….[Mee lardd].
  31. Heere kahan hain?
  32. Barsaat ki kaali raat.
  33. Duniya ki koi taaqat humein judda nahin karr sakkti.
  34. Kanoon jazbaat nahin saboot dekhta hai.
  35. Mujhe maaf karr de beta.
  36. Naajayaz…..[Baap, Beta, Aulad]
  37. Babuji nahin rahe.
  38. Gawahon ke bayaanat aur sabooton ko mad-de nazar rakhte hue mujrim ko ba-izzat barri kia jaata hai.
  39. Hamare purkhon ki jaydaad.
  40. Abb sabb oopar waale ke haath mein hai.
  41. Zamaane ki thhokaron ne mujhe aissa banna dia.
  42. Babuji hum college mein ek saath paddhte thhe.
  43. Mujhse burra koi na hoga!
  44. Mein apne bhai ke khoon ka badla lekar rahoonga.
  45. Meinne do din se kuchh nahin khaya.
  46. Arre isse toh tez bukhar hai.
  47. Kaash tumhaare baabuji zinda hotte.
  48. Isse dhakke maar karr ghar se bahar phenkk do.
  49. Ho sake toh mujhe maaf karr dena.
  50. Bachaooooooo…..

To end this journey behind memory lanes……………

HUMKO MITTA SAKKE WOH ZAMAANE MEIN DUMM NAHIN, ZAMAANA HUM SE HAI…. ZAMAANE SE HUM NAHIN”- “RAJ KUMAR”

raj-kumar

One comment

  1. pooja@falcon1925 · September 25, 2015

    Reblogged this on poojaslibrary.

    Like

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